I am always coaching people all over the country. One of the issues we deal with often is self-esteem. I’ve posted several posts lately on dealing with this from our spiritual inner selves. Trying to developed a discipline of triggers, to prevent creating vicious cycles, from which it is hard for us to escape.
People with good self esteem feel entitled to have their basic needs met. If the needs are not met, they treat it as a task to deal with it. For the person with poor self-esteem, not getting your needs met, can be indicative that you don’t believe you deserve the basic needs others receive. To these souls it can be proof of them not being good enough. It can seem reasonable, if you feel you don’t deserve to be well treated. If you’re always told to put others first, if no one around you treats you like you matter, if your needs are trivialized, never met, or worse, laughed at, this is unhealthy behavior.
Let’s look at the basic things that all humans need. We need rest, food, and shelter. Anyone with any mobility needs opportunities to move. We need stimulation and interest in our lives. We need to feel valued and accepted. If you are denied basic life needs, it can destroy your confidence. One feels that they don’t deserve any of the most basic things necessary. Confident people tend to take what they need, or demand it. They will arise a ruckus when basic needs aren’t met. People with low self esteem can find it hard address such problems.
Whether the problem is ongoing or in the past, one needs to address it. Take a look at your personal history. If you find it hard to express need or to raise it when needs aren’t met, there’s probably a history. When did it happen? Where did it happen? Identifying and accepting that it happened is so important. If the situation is ongoing, I urge you to understand, the situation must change. Ask yourself all of the whys that come into play. Why or who are you afraid of? Why are your or others demands keeping you from knowing you deserve all the basics in life.
The most fundamental thing in life, is the need for you to feel entitled/deserving to the basic things that keep humans functioning. The goal here is to know you are entitled to be treated like everyone else. This is a tough pill to swallow when you don’t feel deserving. Think of the person/s you love most. What do you think they deserve? What, given the current circumstances, would you want them to have? Then know that we were all created to deserve the best of the basics and so much more.
First of all, know that you must seek a gentler more supportive environment. Only then can you begin to rebuild what you deny yourself. Learn to stay in the vibration of those who support you. Avoid at all cost the ones who do not support you on every level. You know I’m right on this one. Why care about hurt feelings of supportive bullies? Passive Aggressive manipulators can’t have their feeling hurt. Not by you or anyone. It’s all about them. This feeling of poor self worth, is an erosion over time of the being you were born to be. I urge you to try, no one, ever deserves to feel worthless. Remember, eventually others may need your support and you need to be your personal best to do that. If all of this is in the past, begin your adventure of rediscovering yourself today. If you are in a situation that is draining your energy resources, get out and to seek better space.
Find the loving tribe you need to move out and onward. Talk to authorities that can guide you if the situation is abusive or violent. You cannot know how good it feels until you take action on your behalf. It is difficult for some but doable always.